8 Strategies for Coping with the Holiday Blues
Fall is officially here and with it comes more time for introspection as we cozy up indoors and look forward to the coming holidays. Many have started planning around holiday events and may be having mixed feelings about this season as it greets us once again amidst an ongoing pandemic. Commonly, the holidays spark feelings of excitement and joy for upcoming gatherings with family and friends. Many others may find the upcoming months more difficult to navigate. Some may already feel holiday blues taking hold, suffering from emotional overwhelm, including sadness, loneliness, irritability, anger, nervousness, or low energy.
Among the range of emotions that come with the holiday blues, grief is the most commonly felt as reminders of important losses are easily triggered during traditional end of year reflection.
Regardless of how you may feel today, this article can offer great therapeutic strategies to increase your bandwidth during this holiday season.
Americans are suffering from more loss this year than ever before. The CDC’s latest reports mark over 760,000 deaths related to US COVID cases since the beginning of the pandemic. According to a study from Proceedings of the National Academy of Science USA (July 2020), about 9 people grieve for each US COVID death. People can also experience grief due to other important losses such as loss of employment, income, housing, and/or reduced social activity due to pandemic restrictions.
Other research shows Americans are suffering from increased symptoms of anxiety and depression since the start of the pandemic. The American Psychological Association published a study in October 2021 claiming that 32% of American adults reported more symptoms of stress related to the pandemic, 74% of adults reported experiencing a recent increase in various physical and emotional concerns (e.g. headaches, feeling overwhelmed, fatigue, or changes in sleeping habits), and that parents and people of color are most impacted by pandemic related stress.
With all the added challenges we face in this pandemic, plus the traditional pressure of the holiday season and holiday blues, we can find some relief with extra support in self care. Yes, self care is extra work to add to your already full plate and can easily feel overwhelming if you are out of practice. The idea of self care is like going to the emotional gym- it can feel like a struggle to get started, but consistency and dedication yields the greatest results.
Here are 8 effective therapeutic tips to try out this season:
Feel your Feelings: It is so important to take a moment to stop and check in with your emotional self. A simple acknowledgement is all you need. You don’t have to lean into your emotions (which can create emotional flooding). You also don’t have to fight off your emotions (which can lead to emotional denial). Practice about 5 minutes of mindfulness by observing and describing your emotions through journaling, meditating, or a simple thought exercise. Avoid judging your feelings; what you are feeling is valid and there is no right or wrong way to feel.
Honor Your Loss: Take some time to reflect on any loss you’ve experienced through the year and how it has affected you. If you lost a loved one recently, it may be helpful to honor them at a holiday event with a special candle, continue a tradition of theirs at your holiday gathering, save an empty seat at the dinner table, or share a favorite memory and pictures. Sometimes, however, it’s better to honor this memory in private before or after the holiday festivities. If you prefer to honor your loved one privately, consider writing them a letter, dedicate an event in their memory, or keep a special item of theirs with you,
Social Connection: Humans are very social creatures (no matter how introverted you are), so take time to reach out to loved ones and supportive others, including your healthcare team. A quick text to someone supportive can go a long way for both parties. If you are feeling lonely and unsure of who to connect with, try an online or in-person support group or make an appointment with your therapist.
Plan Ahead to Down-Size Plans: If you are feeling any bit of overwhelm, do yourself a favor and let go of unnecessary stressors. It may be helpful to make a To-Do list and then cross off tasks that aren’t important. Planning ahead can also help you easily delegate tasks to others. A more simple holiday may be exactly what you need this year, so break up old patterns that don’t serve you well.
Create New Traditions: One great way to create a holiday uplift when you’re feeling down is to try something new. This can include volunteering or donating to a charity to honor the memory of someone or something you lost or to give back to your community. If this feels overwhelming, then try matching your low energy levels with a low energy activity (i.e. watch your favorite holiday or non-holiday movie, make or buy a memorial ornament, or play a board game at your gathering).
Limit Alcohol: Most Americans drink alcoholic beverages during celebratory gatherings and it can be easy to overindulge with alcohol when feeling overwhelmed. If you are already aware of feeling the holiday blues this year, be kind to your mind and body by limiting your alcohol use. Heavy alcohol use can often lead to increased feelings of depression, anxiety, and shame. Go in with a drink limit plan before the festivities start and try out fun mocktails instead.
Remember Basic Self Care: Sometimes a good night’s rest or a healthy meal is all we need to feel more energized. Self care doesn’t have to be a lavish spa day, especially if your budget is tight. Simple exercise, such as light yoga or stretching keeps the body active and can go a long way for our mental health. We often neglect our fundamental needs when feeling overwhelmed, so prioritize the most basic acts of self care (i.e. drink water, eat enough food, and move your body).
Talk to a Counselor: There is nothing wrong with asking for emotional support, so why not ask a professional? Emotional suffering is a natural part of life and we are all going through difficult times right now. Therapeutic support is recommended if you are experiencing excessive symptoms of grief or any other emotional overwhelm. Here are some links for you to get in touch with an available counselor:
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 (24/7)
We have all been through a lot of stress in the last 2 years, so be kind to yourself during this holiday season. Keep in mind that grief and loneliness are challenging during the holidays, so it is important to find helpful ways to make the season just a little more tolerable. Navigate your holiday blues with preventive care tips and your future self will be thankful.
Written by Ashley Bemis, LMHC
