What Is Religious Abuse / Spiritual Abuse?

Religious abuse or Spiritual Abuse occurs when someone uses religious teachings, beliefs, or practices for their own purpose and design to gain, or maintain, power and control over others. This can cause lasting impacts on others who believe in the religious teachings or feel unable to disagree with the teachings, including fear that if you choose to question the faith or even part of the faith, you will be kicked out of your community, you will disappoint others, or that you will go to hell because God is angry at you for your “lack of belief.” Other times people do not feel that they have the opportunity to say no or to escape harmful situations, because they do not know that they can choose to leave, to say no, or to have an opinion that differs from someone else, and often are explicitly told that they cannot disagree and must follow the religion’s rules.

What is Religious Trauma?

Religious trauma is a widespread issue across the world and this country. However, it is only a relatively new recognized stand-alone form of abuse and trauma. Because of this there is very little research, data, and evidence-based treatment options for mental health professionals to utilize. However, clinicians and organization are working hard to research religious abuse and trauma, as well as create effective Religious Trauma Counseling options.

The Global Center for Religious Research (GCRR) is one organization working to collect data and share research. GCRR created a definition for religious trauma based on current research which states, “religious trauma results from an event, series of events, relationships, or circumstances within or connected to religious beliefs, practices, or structures that is experienced by an individual as overwhelming or disruptive and has lasting adverse effects on a person’s physical, mental, social, emotional, or spiritual well-being.”

What is Purity Culture?

In general, Purity Culture stems from a set of beliefs which were taught – specifically to youths and adolescents – in the Christian church that sex should only be experienced between one man and one woman after being legally married. Any sexual experiences outside of this (i.e., LGBTQIA+ relationships and identities, premarital sex, masturbation, etc.) are considered wrong and “sinful.” The term Purity Culture encapsulates the teachings, beliefs, books, movies, clothing items, and merchandise that came out of this belief system and impacted organizations, families, and individuals.

Here are a few examples of religious abuse that may cause symptoms of trauma:

Emotional, physical, sexual, and financial abuse and manipulation within the context of or with the justification of religious texts, beliefs, contexts, and teachings.
Dismissing, minimizing, or rejecting mental health issues.
Using fear, guilt, and shame as tactics to increase obedience and church involvement.
Rigid, inflexible adherence to the teachings of purity culture.
Feeling unable to say “no,” give consent (physically, emotionally, spiritually), or voice different opinions within religious contexts, families, social settings, etc.
Feeling forced or coerced to do things that you don’t want to do, including but not limited to engaging in sex, giving money, sharing resources, etc.
Using religious belief and fervor to perpetuate violence, force others to “convert” to their religious beliefs and practices, or encourage a belief that one group is better than another for their beliefs and practices.

If you have experienced any of the above, please know that you are not alone, you are worthy of love (regardless of your religious or spiritual beliefs, and religious trauma counseling can help.

Sign and symptoms of trauma related to religious abuse:

Low self-esteem and pervasive negative self-talk.
Pervasive and obsessive worries about “not being a good person” or “not being saved.”
Difficulty trusting self (thoughts, feelings, and needs).
Feeling inappropriate guilt over events, interactions, and actions taken that are not your fault or within your control.
Fear of God’s wrath and punishment for “sins.”
Fear of death/the afterlife/hell/the devil.
Nightmares related to religious motifs, beliefs, or other traumatic experiences related to religious leaders, events, experiences.
Extreme difficulty or aversion to using assertive communication or setting boundaries.
For many women – feeling ashamed of your sexuality, body, thoughts, and urges.
For many men – feeling ashamed of natural sexual urges, thoughts, actions.

*Please note this list is not exhaustive and may be subject to change as research and data pool grows. This is what mental health providers and survivors of religious abuse have reported.*

Religious Trauma Counseling Can Help:

If you have experienced religious trauma and abuse, many evidenced based and evidence informed modality can be used to treat and heal from those experiences, including Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy (EMDR), Somatic Experiencing (SE), Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), Lifespan Integration (LI), Trauma Focused CBT (TFCBT), and more. These forms of treatment are very effective in treating trauma, including religious trauma.

Whatever treatment approach you and your therapist use, it is important to feel validated in your experiences of religious trauma, as well as unravel and challenge harmful beliefs and thought processes, and gain increased connection with and understanding of yourself.

Navigating Faith Transitions:

While engaging in Religious Trauma Counseling, you may decide to begin a faith transition, which is the process of re-examining your personal thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about religion, which may lead you to abandon a faith belief system and community, deconstruct faith, reimagine faith, or change to a different faith system. This can be a very scary time where your personal identities and relationships are challenged and may change, and typically involve some serious emotional hurdles, including grief and loss, guilt and shame, feeling rejected by others, and loss of certainty.